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Monday, August 23, 2010

Cakes. Oh yeah....BOOBIES!


Here's the cake I made for my brother in law this weekend.

Reflections and thanks.

So today I have stalked several new blogs. Some have been utterly hilarious, some overpoweringly emotional, and some just down right inspirational. All from reading what YOU took the time to share. I enjoy peeping into your lives and seeing through your eyes, living your experiences, and realting to some. (Oh Dutchess, I don't think anyone will top yours dear.) But today I am reflecting on the 1 blog that I have followed for well over a year. The one blog that I had to step away from because I got so emotionally involved. I missed out, on a lot, but am enjoying all the cathing up.

Today I cried. I cried at the thought of Heather being at the park swinging Annie, but missing Maddie. I cried for Annie not having her sweet big sister Maddie there to cheer her on. I cried for all the mom's that are missing that one special little one in their life. And I laughed. I laughed at the joy on Annie's face, the joy that warms the soul and melts the heart. That pure innocence and trust pouring out of that sweet loving face as she sees her mom behind the camera. I am comforted.

I sit here and reflect on my life with my girls. I think about the fact that I have both my girls and take both of them to the park to swing. That I tuck both of my girls in at night, they both like to wake me up at 4am, and stay up until 6:30am when the alarm goes off. I think on all this, the "hard stuff" that so many of us complain about. That we get frustrated and vexed by, and I remember. I remember Maddie, and Charlie, and Lyla, and Landyn. Then I remember, their moms. And I thank God for putting them in my path, and humbling me. Reminding me how utterly Blessed and lucky *I* am to be getting up at 4am with BOTH my girls. I thank you for sharing.

Blogging is a newfound freedom for me. I ramble. A lot. I try really hard to make cohesive paragraphs and spell correctly and use propper grammar. But the hell with it if I don't.
I. Am Here.
Blogging about life as me, and enjoying every minute of it. =0) So, if you've made it this far. Here, have a cookie. ;-P



Thank you all that blog publicly and share your laughs, cries, utter hilarity, evilness, or prom queen rebel slutness. You make my day. =0)

Friday, August 20, 2010

COCKtail Time, Bitches!

BWS tips button>One Crazy Brunette Chick



So, in honor of the One and ONLY, Awesomely Bitchy, Trashy Mouthed-Trophy Wife and The Rebel Slut Prom Queen aka Crazy Brunette, I'm dedicating my Fridays to introducing you douchebags to one new cocktail a week.



This week, in celebration of the newest Royal Family member, The Dame of the Penis Platter, (I bow to you bitches) I'm making a Dirty Tito's Peter. =0)
(yes I just put a fucking smiley face at the end so get the fuck over it! THAT's how happy Dirty Peter's make me!)


First you will need these ingredients. And no skimping either fucktards!



1 bottle of Tito's Handmade Vodka (Made in Texas BITCHES!)

1 bottle of Major Peter's The Works Bloody Mary Mix

1 jar of green olives and some juice

1 shot glass that is almost as big as your fucking glass

1 leafy stalk of celery


















Add one FULL shot of Tito's (don't be a fucking pussy here!). Top off with Major Peter's Mix, a splash of Olive juice, 3 olives, and your celery stalk to the side to make it all fucking pretty and shit.




This is the final product bitches. So drink the fuck up!

Now on to my First FAWK You Friday.

FAWK YOU- to the bitch that likes to pose. You know who you are.

FAWK YOU - to the shitty family members that go back on their word.

FAWK YOU - to the school administration that makes meet the teacher one night only and one fucking hour long!

FAWK YOU - to all this damn heat and humidity!


Thursday, August 19, 2010

So fucking busy!




Life has just totally kicked my ass in the past month. We've buried 2 grandpa's, have 1 grandma that broke her hip, Abbi's 1st birthday party rocked and my cake was FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC, kids school shopping, kids sports, and OMGosh, kids in DANCE! Never thought my little softball diva would hang up her cleats but Holy Hell batman, she wants to fucking DANCE!

F.A.T.S. Momma's is taking off in a HUGE way. I sell shit as soon as I post it, so I don't have ANY freaking stock and I have my first craft fair on Sept 4th. YAY! So, that shit has me SWAMPED!

I've also learned a few life lessons in past week. 1. about who my REAL fucking friends are and 2. Never do favors for family because they bite you in the fucking ass!

I totally rocked Abs's 1st birthday party and the cake was AMAZING! So much so, that I am now getting CAKE ORDERS on top of all my other shit I'm doing! Send me some speed peeps so I can keep up! Well, the mini me is up so I'll holla at you later loves, miss me! <3

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

What I meant to say....

WIMTS
Setting the scene.
10:30am Fayth wakes up. Running into living room.
Fayth: "Mommy, wook."
Points to nose.
Me: "Aww....honey come here, you got boogies."
What I meant to say:
Me: "Holy F*CK Batman! *GAG* What the hell did you do kid, use your hair to blow your nose?!!?"